My
beloved parents would have been married 72 years today. They were very
fortunate to have been together here on earth for 48 years. That's a rare
statistic these days.
They were blessed with 3 children they put through college. Neither of my parents
went on to college so they were especially proud they could do that for us. They
marrried in 1945 and their firstborn, Cary Ronald, would be born almost exactly one
year from the day they got married. Sandra Gail would come along three years later.
They 'waited a spell' (10 years) to have lil ole me. (It's not widely known, but momma had two other children - a boy, (Dennis), almost full term who was stillborn as a result of a car accident on their way to her final Drs appt before the baby was to be born). The Doctor could not find or hear his heartbeat and mom had to carry him another month knowing he was already gone. I cannot imagine the devastation I know they both suffered during that time. Three years later, I came along and was transported to Le Bonheurs Children's Hospital in Memphis where I underwent a complete blood transfusion due to the negative Rh factor. (Back then this was rare and transfusion was the only way for baby's to be viable. Today, there's a simple shot that can be taken during pregnancy to prevent a baby from danger.) They also had another baby girl (after me, Yvonne,) who was also Rh negative but she passed away on the way to Le Bonheur. Momma did not know about her passing away until a few days later. Again, she and dad were devastated. I know without a doubt she suffered with postpartum depression before anyone ever knew that would become a common REAL mental health diagnosis. I recall she told me after I miscarried once to not be afraid to let myself grieve. She commented once that "nobody ever knew the psychological pain I was in and total despair I felt - nobody but your sweet daddy." Apparently you didn't openly talk about those things back then. The look on her face as we talked about her sorrow during that sad time is forever etched and burned in my memory. It reminds me of
the quote about not judging others because we never know what they may be dealing
with in their homes, at their work, with their health, or in their heart of hearts. I try so hard to be mindful of that every single day --- there but for the Grace of God go I. Little did we know I would spend a lot of years in my career helping grieving families who lost babies in the NICU. I often thought of my sweet momma and what she dealt with (mostly) alone all those years ago. Strangely enough - perhaps my helping others along the way somehow helped momma too.
They were blessed with 3 children they put through college. Neither of my parents
went on to college so they were especially proud they could do that for us. They
marrried in 1945 and their firstborn, Cary Ronald, would be born almost exactly one
year from the day they got married. Sandra Gail would come along three years later.
They 'waited a spell' (10 years) to have lil ole me. (It's not widely known, but momma had two other children - a boy, (Dennis), almost full term who was stillborn as a result of a car accident on their way to her final Drs appt before the baby was to be born). The Doctor could not find or hear his heartbeat and mom had to carry him another month knowing he was already gone. I cannot imagine the devastation I know they both suffered during that time. Three years later, I came along and was transported to Le Bonheurs Children's Hospital in Memphis where I underwent a complete blood transfusion due to the negative Rh factor. (Back then this was rare and transfusion was the only way for baby's to be viable. Today, there's a simple shot that can be taken during pregnancy to prevent a baby from danger.) They also had another baby girl (after me, Yvonne,) who was also Rh negative but she passed away on the way to Le Bonheur. Momma did not know about her passing away until a few days later. Again, she and dad were devastated. I know without a doubt she suffered with postpartum depression before anyone ever knew that would become a common REAL mental health diagnosis. I recall she told me after I miscarried once to not be afraid to let myself grieve. She commented once that "nobody ever knew the psychological pain I was in and total despair I felt - nobody but your sweet daddy." Apparently you didn't openly talk about those things back then. The look on her face as we talked about her sorrow during that sad time is forever etched and burned in my memory. It reminds me of
the quote about not judging others because we never know what they may be dealing
with in their homes, at their work, with their health, or in their heart of hearts. I try so hard to be mindful of that every single day --- there but for the Grace of God go I. Little did we know I would spend a lot of years in my career helping grieving families who lost babies in the NICU. I often thought of my sweet momma and what she dealt with (mostly) alone all those years ago. Strangely enough - perhaps my helping others along the way somehow helped momma too.
I started this blog to simply pay homage to and wish my parents a Happy Anniversary. But they are finally reunited again after nearly a quarter century apart. They are celebrating this year amongst the most magnificent audience: the precious Lord and other loved ones and friends. Love you both so much - thank you for being such wonderful parents. And last but certainly not least, thank you Lord - for the gift of them. The best gift of all is knowing they will be together for all eternity. See Ya'll Soon!
I often think about Yvonne (I don't know if I knew her name), because we would have been the same age, I think? That would have been trouble I bet:)
ReplyDeleteYes, you sure would have been the same age. Trouble with a capital T. Haha. You would likely have been very close - like we are, prolly even more-so. Her little headstone is out there beside mom and dad. Dennis had a marker at the cemetery out from Burdette - toward Blytheville, near that big curve. They found the marker later and wanted to have him moved to where mom and dads other plots are - but never could find the marker again. They always wanted him to have a headstone too. It's a shame, mom always said. I agree.
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